I once saw a question: “What’s the ultimate result of a marriage where one party constantly gives in?” Someone replied, “Either you’ll reach the end of your marriage, or you’ll suffer alone until the end.” That’s a harsh reality.
A marriage is like a desert where you quench each other’s thirst. If you’re always giving in and compromising, the marriage will only drain your life away, like a scorching sun that brings nothing but pain.
The Harm of One-Sided Sacrifices in Marriage
Coco Lee, the singer who struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts, was in a marriage where she constantly gave in. After getting married, Coco tried her best to be a perfect wife. She worked hard, took care of her husband’s daughter, and even forgave him when he cheated on her.
However, her sacrifices didn’t bring her husband back to her. Instead, she suffered from depression, and her life became a living hell. Coco’s story is a typical example of how one-sided sacrifices can lead to pain and suffering in a marriage.
My neighbor, Mrs. Wang, is another example. Her husband was addicted to gambling and drinking, and she had to work hard to pay off his debts. She would often cry to us, saying, “I’ve tolerated him for so many years, hoping he would change.” But her sacrifices didn’t change her husband, and he eventually stole her savings, leaving her bedridden and struggling to survive.
In a marriage, one-sided sacrifices often don’t bring the desired love and care. Instead, they can lead to more harm and suffering.
The Consequences of One-Sided Giving in Marriage
In any relationship, whether it’s with family, friends, or partners, there’s a harsh reality: people will treat you the way you treat yourself. If you don’t respect yourself, others won’t respect you either.
In a marriage, one-sided giving can lead to an imbalance, where one party feels drained and unappreciated. This can cause resentment and even lead to the breakdown of the relationship.
My friend, Xiaojie, learned this the hard way. She gave her all to her husband, hoping to get love and care in return. But her husband didn’t appreciate her efforts and instead became increasingly cold and distant. Xiaojie’s sacrifices only led to more pain and suffering.
A marriage needs mutual respect and giving. One-sided sacrifices can lead to an imbalance, causing the relationship to crumble.
Learn to Love Yourself First
There’s a saying: “We spend our entire lives trying to break free from others’ expectations and find our true selves.” It’s essential to focus on our own growth and development, rather than trying to change others.
To break free from one-sided sacrifices in a marriage, try the following:
Find your self-worth: Focus on your own growth and development, rather than relying on others for validation.
Set boundaries: Learn to say no and prioritize your own needs and feelings.
Lower your expectations: Don’t expect others to fulfill your emotional needs. Instead, focus on your own happiness and growth.
Remember, a good marriage is built on mutual respect and giving. Don’t sacrifice yourself for someone else’s love and care. Focus on your own growth, and you’ll attract someone who truly loves and respects you.